3rd Person Bios are a thing of the past. It feels gross to say "Jess is an accomplished author, having written more than fifteen books" blah blah. I'm just a dude, slamming the keys, trying to make stuff up that makes people happy.

I've been writing a long time. First short story was this very self-absorbed Little Mermaid fanfic I wrote at 5. My next big "writer" moment was finishing my first novel at 14. It was 120,000 words of horrible. I have a copy on my shelf, but it will likely never see the light of day. At 16 I was told by my Creative Writing teacher that "I had a lot of potential," and that was it for me. Sayonara to any other job, I was going to be an author.

As for all the other things that happened in my life along the way, I worked in video games for about 9 years, tech in general for 14, busted my right labrum (hip joint stuff) and my right sub-scapular (shoulder stuff) so I'm like a hobbly old person now (not really, just in pain a lot). I like to cook (and eat) a lot, which is why I run, do yoga, hike as often as I can, and have a treadmill desk for my office. I want to get back into rock climbing but man, that torn sub-scap is a beeotch.

Oh, you still want to know more? Sure. I live in Colorful Colorado (though recently the primary color has been fire and that makes me sad). I live with my loving partner and two awesome roommates. We play video games as often as we can, chillax on the couch watching memes and superhero movies/shows, passionately discuss fantasy lore, and generally enjoy ourselves.

There really isn't more to tell, I promise, but thanks for hanging in there. I hope you got what you wanted from this...